During the opening scene of this issue, Kyle Rayner–imbued with the powers of all the rings… well, not really but Bedard misses that plot hole–starts spewing like a Red Lantern.
He spews while speaking Bedard’s dialogue, which proves a nice metaphor for the issue in general and Bedard’s writing in particular. Obviously, not all of the problems are Bedard’s fault. He’s not the idiot who named the Orange Lantern leader Agent Orange, he just works for the idiot who did.
It’s a strange issue in how little happens. The ringless (but still able to survive in space and still possessing superpowers) supporting cast goes to Oa to confront Kyle. Except Kyle thinks they’re on their way to rescue him. Makes a lot of sense.
There’s nothing to recommend the comic.
Wait, there’s a funny fat ghost Lantern. It’s even kind of cute, like an orange Slimer from Ghostbusters.
Yay for terribly written exposition flashbacks. Yay!
See, I’m trying to be positive about New Guardians and not laugh at Kirkham’s hair on Kyle Rayner. I mean, it’s some silly hair. But probably not as silly as his three day stubble… because Kyle’s a young, hip rebel.
Though I do like the new costume design on Kyle as an omni-Lantern (when he’s got on all the rings). Not sure if that one’s Kirkham or Harvey Tolibao. It’s very… well, it kind of makes Kyle look like a drag queen, which is funny.
Having one funny page in the issue helps, because there’s nothing amusing about the rest of it.
Frighteningly, Bedard’s plotting is even worse than his dialogue and he misses some great opportunities. Like when Kyle leaves psychotic aliens on earth assuming they won’t hurt anyone… Bedard misses a big opportunity.
New Guardians isn’t just bad, it’s boring.
New Guardians opens in flashback. Only no one mentions it’s in flashback, which made me think I was going to suffer through Tony Bedard relaunching Kyle Rayner. Instead, I just had to suffer through Bedard’s attempt at writing a female character.
Actually, Bedard’s got a strange undercurrent of misogyny in the comic. As opposed to the rest of the DC relaunch, where it’s neon.
The issue’s a bit of a rip-off at $2.99. Not just because the dialogue’s bad and Tyler Kirkham’s anatomy is lousy. It’s because Bedard doesn’t even set up the stupid comic. Either it’s about Kyle Rayner with an assorted team of other color Lanterns or he just gets a bunch of color rings.
Bedard doesn’t even keep up the casual misogyny, which was at least interesting.
There’s nothing good about this comic book. Guardians starts at to the bottom of the toilet and stays there.